Yo Momma!

Yo momma is so ugly..... Your momma is so fat....

Yo momma so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up!

Yo momma so fat her nickname is "DAMN"

Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.

Yo momma so fat were in her right now!

Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise!

Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone !

Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors.

Yo momma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...

Yo momma so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for the new world.

Yo momma so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy!

Yo momma so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!

Yo momma so fat when she has sex, she has to give directions!

Yo momma so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"

Yo momma so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"

Yo momma so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized!

Yo momma so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway.

Yo momma so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

Yo momma so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets.

Yo momma so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th.

Yo momma so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too.

Yo momma so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"

Yo momma so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!

Yo momma so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"

Yo momma so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.

Yo momma so fat she fell in love and broke it.

Yo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.

Yo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.

Yo momma so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!

Yo momma so fat she's got her own area code!

Yo momma so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!

Yo momma so fat God couldn't light Earth till she moved!

Yo momma so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!

Yo momma so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!

Yo momma so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...

Yo momma so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.

Yo momma so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!

Yo momma so fat that when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips!

Yo momma so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!

Yo momma so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand!

Yo momma so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!

Yo momma so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!

Yo momma so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearin tights!

Yo momma so fat she got hit by a parked car!

Yo momma so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!

Yo momma so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans!

Yo momma so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping.

Yo momma so fat when they used her underwear elastic for bungee jumping, they hit the ground.

Yo momma so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.

Yo momma so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.

Yo momma so fat she influences the tides.

Yo momma so fat that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas.

Yo momma so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.

Yo momma so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.

Yo momma so fat the Aids quilt wouldn't even cover her

Yo momma so fat she stands in two time zones.

Yo momma so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops.

Yo momma so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through

Yo momma so fat when the woman goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.

Yo momma so fat that she cant tie her own shoes.

Yo momma so fat sets off car alarms when she runs.

Yo momma so fat she cant reach her back pocket.

Yo momma so fat when she wears one of those X jackets, helicopters try to land on her back!

Yo momma so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth

Yo momma so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures.

Yo momma so fat she put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard.

Yo momma so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles.

Yo momma so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.

Yo momma so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, she caused an eclipse.

Yo momma so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl.

Yo momma so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it.

Yo momma so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"

Yo momma so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow!

Yo momma so fat that when whe was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.

Yo momma so fat the National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts!!!

Yo momma so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her as a Chevrolet.

Yo momma so fat her butt looks like two pigs fighting over a Hershe Kiss.

Yo momma so fat she has to grease her hands to get into her pockets.

Yo momma so fat the shadow of her ass weighed 50 pounds

Yo momma so fat her navel gets home 15 minutes before she does.

Yo momma so fat if she weighed 5 more pounds, she could get group insurance.

Yo momma so fat if she was a superhero, she would be "incredible bulk."

Yo momma so fat God said, "Let there be light, "right after she moved her fat ass.

Yo momma so fat a picture of her fell off the wall.

Yo momma so fat at the zoo the elephants started throwing her peanuts.

Yo momma so fat when she swims, she leaves stretch marks on the pool.

Yo momma so fat the telephone company gave her two area codes.

Yo momma so fat the back of her neck looks like a pack of hotdogs.

Yo momma so fat she's got her own zip code.

Yo momma so fat she cut herself and bled butter flavored Crisco.

Yo momma so fat when she goes outside, the have to grease the streets.

Yo momma so fat she uses bacon for band aids.

Yo momma so fat she can't even jump to a conclusion.

Yo momma so fat she had her ears pierced by harpoon.

Yo momma so fat she needs a watch on both arms because she covers two time zones.

Yo momma so fat she has two stomachs, one for meats and one for vegetables.

Yo momma so fat when she goes to a restaurant she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimage.

Yo momma so fat she plays Tiddly Winks with manhole covers.

Yo momma so fat she plays marbles with planets.

Yo momma so fat she tripped on the Alps and burned her lips on the sun.

Yo momma so fat if she fell out of a tree she'd go straight to hell.

Yo momma so fat every time she puts an apple in her mouth people try to roast her.

Yo momma so fat when she turns around they throw her a welcome back party.

Yo momma so fat she uses a satellite dish as a diaphragm.

Yo momma so fat when she brought her dress to the cleaners they told her, "sorry, we don't do curtains."

Yo momma so fat that she ate your chicken pox.

Yo momma so fat she had her baby pictures taken by satellite.

Yo momma so fat I went to wake her up and she was stuck in a dream.

Yo momma so fat she's on a lite diet as soon as it gets light out she eats.

Yo momma so fat she sells shade in teh summer.

Yo momma so fat that when she was walking down the street, this guy came up to her and said, "Hey you, yeha you in the middle."

Yo momma so fat that when she went to the airport and told them she wanted to fly, they stamped GOODYEAR on her ass and put her on the runway.

Yo momma so fat she needs a building permit for her girdle.

Yo momma so fat she sat on a quarter and got change.

Yo momma so fat when she went to the beach, she was the only one who got a tan.

Yo momma so fat your bathtub has stretch marks.

Yo momma so fat they use her underwear for bungee jumping.

Yo momma so fat her nick name is Shamu.

Yo momma so fat she's like the Bermuda Triangle; when kids run around her they get lost.

Yo momma so fat she stepped on a dime and picked up two nickels.

Yo momma so fat she can sit on a rock and make it a diamond.

Yo momma so fat you need a trucker's license to ride her.

Yo momma so fat they add grease to teh bathtub to get her out.

Yo momma so fat they got her face on the Crisco can.

Yo momma so fat they use her girdle as a hammock.

Yo momma so fat when she wears a yellow dress kids try to board her at the corner.

Yo momma so fat they tax her breasts as carry on luggage.

Yo momma so fat she puts on tampons with a bazooka.

Yo momma so fat when she takes a shower her feel don't get wet.

Yo momma so fat when she bends over we lose an hour of daylight.

Yo momma so fat when she wears her green and white sweater, she looks like a football field.

Yo momma so fat when you put your ear up to her butt, you can hear the ocean.

Yo momma so fat she shows up on radar.

Yo momma so fat she hitch hikes on dump trucks.

Yo momma so fat she uses hoola hoops to hold up her socks.

Yo momma so fat that she needs a sock for each toe.

Yo momma so fat she was the cause of a major crash.

Yo momma so fat she's got her own gravational pull.

Yo momma so fat everytime someone says, "Kool Aid," she busts through the wall.

Yo momma so fat they wrote a book about her, it was called Moby Dick.

Yo momma so fat she was Miss Arizona -- Class Battleship.

Yo momma so fat she accidently got a 747 caught in her teeth.

Yo momma so fat to her "light food" means under 4 tons.

Yo momma so fat the Himalayas are practice runs to prepare for her.

Yo momma so fat her waist size is larger than her IQ. V Yo momma so fat she was zoned for commercial development.

Yo momma so fat she won Miss Bessie the Cow '94.

Yo momma so fat God can't lift her spirits.

Yo momma so fat she wipes her ass with a mattress.

Yo mamma so tall, she tripped and burned her lip on the sun.

Yo Momma so ugly...