3 guys, an Australian, a Canadian, and an American are looking for jobs. There was a farmer who was hiring, and the 3 of them applied for the job. The farmer told them that he was sorry but he only had enough money to pay one of them so they were going to have a game and whomever won, would get the job. He tells the Australian to go and pick his favorite fruit from his orchard, and bring it in to him. The Australian picked an Orange and returned. The farmer explained that the Australian was to put the orange in his ass and sit there for one minute while the farmer put a gun to his head, and if he laughed at anytime before the minute was up, he would be killed. The Australian did as he was told, but unfortunately he couldn't keep from laughing, and was shot only after 15 seconds.

Next the farmer asked the Canadian to go and pick his favorite fruit, and come back. The Canadian returned with an apple, and the rules were explained to him. The Canadian did very well. He only had 5 seconds left before his time was up, but he couldn't seem to help himself and started laughing. So he was shot with only 5 seconds left on the clock.

At the gates of heaven he met up with the Australian. The Australian just had to know, so he asked: "you only had 5 seconds left, what happened??" To which the Canadian replied, I saw the American returning with his fruit, he picked a melon!"

The Cannibals...

Three men who were lost in the forest were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial. The first step of the trial was to go to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So all three men went separate ways to gather fruits.

The first one came back and said to the king, "I brought ten apples."

The king then explained the trial to him. "You have to shove the fruits up your butt without any expression on your face or you'll be eaten."

The first apple went in... but on the second one he winced out in pain, so he was killed.

The second one arrived and showed the king ten berries. When the king explained the trial to him he thought to himself that this should be easy. 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8... and on the ninth berry he burst out in laughter and was killed.

The first guy and the second guy met in heaven. The first one asked, "Why did you laugh, you almost got away with it?" The second one replied, "I couldn't help it, I saw the third guy coming with pineapples."

:-) KEEP SMILIN' :-)
and have a nice day