I hope you're in the mood for a few stories. Without further delay:

My good friend Leslie and I were talking about AOL people who can't figure out shit. She wrote: I write a newsletter for teachers -- most are AOL and they pride themselves on being technophobs. I had a teacher unsubscribe recently because, even though she "enjoyed the FREE newsletter and found it quite useful, it was too EXPENSIVE but she could understand how large schools could afford it."

Jennifer's friend has two sisters. We all live in Texas. The sisters approached my friend and asked where the lighthouses were. When my friend tried to probe a little bit, the sisters told her, "Yeah, they're good paying jobs and have lots of ads in the paper but we don't know where the lighthouses are to apply." My friend told them there are no lighthouses in Texas. "Let me see that newspaper." Sure enough, there ads for "Light Housekeeping needed. Apply in person."

KD set up Judi's computer for her recently to help her get online. He told her that there was limited space on the "C" drive and anything she downloads should go to the "D" drive. "At one point she called me and asked me how to download. I told her to 'doubleclick'. She said she didn't have time to learn how to do that. A couple of days later she said that she had no more space on the "C" drive. I asked her why didn't she download the stuff to "D". She said, 'I DID. "D" is for "Desktop", right.'"

Dr Ken told me about passing a Chevy Suburban on the hiway. It was towing a boat with an outboard motor. The motor was obviously in neutral because the propeller was spinning like crazy from the slip-stream under the car. I turned to my wife, pointed to the boat, and said, tongue in cheek, "Look, that's a good idea. Those Suburbans are heavy and burn a lot of gas so this guy started his boat motor so the propeller will help PUSH him!" My wife, said, in all seriousness, wow, that *is* a good idea. I wonder why more folks don't do that."

Angela's mother bought an Expedition. "She was observing the raised bumps on the cruise control pad on the steering wheel when she said, 'Oh, look, they have braille so blind people can work the cruise control...' "

Marcus told me they were sitting in Bio & PhySci discussing sex. (Educational wise, not presidental wise). The teacher asked why semen has sugar in it. (It's so the sperm will have energy). Judi asks, in all seriousness: "So it'll taste good?"