CONFUCIUS SAY: "Passionate kiss like spider's web -- soon lead to undoing of fly."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Baseball is wrong -- man with four balls cannot walk."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Woman who wears G-string, high on crack."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Wife who put husband in dog house soon find him in cat house."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "It takes many nails to build a crib, but one screw to fill it."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man who bounce woman on bed spring this Spring have offspring next Spring."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "A man with his hands in pockets feels foolish, but a man with holes in pockets feels nuts."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man who stand on toilet high on pot."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man who jizz in cash register come into money."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man who fart in church must sit in own pew."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man who finger girl having period get caught red handed."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man trapped in pantry have ass in jam."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Baseball wrong--man with four balls cannot walk."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man who eat many prunes get good run for money."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Learn to masturbate--come in handy."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Woman who pounce on dead rooster go down on limp cock."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Man who buy drowned cat must pay for wet pussy."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "Virgin like balloon--one prick, all gone."

CONFUCIUS SAY: "It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl."